“Everyone makes mistakes, they learn from them” - you have probably heard this phrase already 1000 times, and it can be used to justify the mistakes that are described here, and which you may make.
Everything is correct - each person makes mistakes, but there are those that must be avoided. They are our real enemies, every day, every second leaves us forever, it is worth understanding and learning mindfulness - to live now and in this moment - whatever it may be. A moment cannot be good or bad, only we ascribe to it one or the other.
If you, having read the article, realize that you are making the same mistakes that most people make, then you should get rid of them as soon as possible. Take a look at the watch - the hand always moves only forward ...
10. Live past or future
Each of us has memories, and often they are the ones that prevent us from living in the present. But where did you get that in the past it was better?
As you know, we recall distortedly - it seems to us that it was better, but in reality everything could have been much worse than it is now. Remember in more detail something from the past, and it turns out that your attention was not in the present - you lived either in the past or in the future, as you are now.
And then you also thought that it would be better later or sometime. Perhaps in your life now there is what you once dreamed about ... So why are you not satisfied with what is happening again?
If you learn to live here and now, you will become awakened. There is no past, no future - there is now.
9. Afraid to take risks
There are people who say: “I do not know what I want in life,” but in reality there are no such people! There are those who think they don’t know what they want, and that’s another.
Each person has a lot of desires, they start with small ones and end with large-scale ones - one person may want to drink aromatic coffee in the morning, and in the evening he dreams of a house by the sea. Then why does he say that he does not know what he wants?
The thing is that when people say so, they mean some kind of “voluminous” goal, like finding the meaning of life, but they don’t look for it on purpose, and when a person is awakened, everything makes sense to him.
But you can start taking risks - confess your love to an “inaccessible” person, buy a lottery ticket, get to know someone on the street ... Do what you want, take risks - you will not lose anything, but you will gain a lot.
8. Do not value what is
The phrase: “You do not value what you have” carries depth and wisdom in life. It always seems to people that if they were born in another country, if they had a different appearance, if they had a lot of money, then everything would be different ...
How else and why should it be better? Everyone - the beautiful, the poor, the rich, the sick have problems, and this is normal. When your attention is focused on what surrounds you, you will always have problems, earthly life is not without difficulties, it’s just that they are all different.
Take a look at your beloved cat and stroke it, do not hang up the next time a friend calls you, give support to your relatives - value what you have, because you will not have another life. Our world is a reflection of our thoughts, and what it will be - we choose.
7. Do not live as you want
Most people “hide” from the world, as if it is capable of doing harm. At this time, adventurers and dreamers live a happy life and the way they want.
People who are open to the world and do not neglect their desires - achieve much more than those who live according to the schedule and plans.
Sometimes it seems that such people are frivolous and crazy, but do they really care what others think of them if they are happy?
You need to stop justifying someone's expectations, and act out of your desires and interests. Let them condemn and mock you - the main thing is that you will feel alive.
6. To think that happiness can be bought for money
People are used to repeating the phrase: “Happiness cannot be bought for money,” but for some reason they themselves contradict it, sitting in a stuffy office to make money.
In the modern world, everyone thinks about money, looks at their watches and counts minutes, repeating that time is money, they live for the sake of accumulation, and life passes by them.
What does it mean to pass by? The simplest thing you can think of. A man sits in the office and looks at the spring street outside the window, recalls his beloved park, which he so loves to walk in those rare moments when there is time ...
He would like to go to this park right now and eat ice cream, but his work ends at 6, and he is forced to give up his desire.
You should not quit your job at all, but you must understand that happiness is a unique moment when you sincerely rejoice. Such moments cannot be bought for money, stop rushing and pay attention to the good that you have.
5. Total fear
There has already been a point that one of our fatal mistakes is the fear of risk. The same paragraph is a little about other fears. Fears are the product of our brain, one is afraid of spiders, and the other is lost in a strange city. But are they justified?
In fact, if a person finds himself in a strange city, he is unlikely to get lost - he will ask passers-by for the way, get to the hotel by taxi, but his fear is so strong that he can even refuse to travel.
We do not know what will come, an unpleasant situation can happen at any moment, and it is not necessarily associated with fear. What we are afraid of - this is not, this is the projection of our brain.
Fear does not exist without us. It’s just that a projection is embedded in our brain, and our body reacts to something. Fear can be defeated if we eradicate its internal causes.
4. Think only about yourself
Each person is selfish, but imagine how much pain you can inflict on a person with your indifference, heartlessness, greed and cruelty?
Many people consider themselves good, having no idea what kindness is. Kindness exists where there is disinterestedness - it manifests itself in those moments when you are doing something good for others - not to be praised or because you are brought up that way, but from good intentions.
Kindness is to feed the birds, give wise advice to the person, to make someone pleasant without the desire to get something in return.
Do not go over your heads when you want to get something, maybe tomorrow you will need someone's help. But imagine if everyone will only think about themselves ... What will our world turn into?
3. Be a perfectionist
A perfectionist is one who believes that an ideal exists, and he tries to achieve it. Perfectionists, as a rule, live on a schedule, they try not to make mistakes, think through everything in advance ... Often they are said to have “excellent pupil syndrome” about them.
Indeed, these people try to be exemplary - in the family, at work, in the circle of friends, so that others give them the highest score.
Why is this bad? If a perfectionist makes a mistake, he may become depressed and experience real torment.
We cannot take life under control - the world does not depend on us, it carries us with the flow, but only we choose which raft to sail on - the raft of discontent or pleasure.
2. To regret done or not done
What is the point if you regret what you did or what you did not do when you needed it? Is it possible to return everything back and fix it? Whether you did it or not, you will never know how it would be better.
Sometimes the consequences are very sad, and saying: “Before you had to think” is very rude. Believe me - even in bad things there are pluses.
It is possible that you have become wiser or some kind of situation has led you to a favorable event in your life. At that moment, you did as you wanted, as you saw fit, that over time we see the situation differently and say to ourselves: “If I came back now, I would change everything” - this is normal, because we are growing, only at that moment you could not do otherwise.
Do not reproach yourself and accept everything that happened or what did not happen.
1. To think: “I must”
To do through “I do not want” means to do what “you must”. How many of these “do not want” in your life and why do you continue to do what you do if it makes you miserable and drooping?
Discipline and responsibility are good ... or not? Who came up with the idea that discipline is so useful to us? Indeed, it is disciplined people who do not attach importance to their desires and live according to a schedule.
We are used to thinking that an adult should have responsibilities, work and discipline, otherwise they will not be taken seriously.
You do not need to let everything go by its own accord, forget about your work and close for a week in the apartment so that no one bothers - this is also not what you really want ...
But you should learn one simple rule - if you do not want something, then you should not do it.